When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
