Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You're like the curious george of whores
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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