I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
