So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
