i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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