Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
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