Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Randomize
