so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I look excited, but its just a facade.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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