Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
