Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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