You really coming over, don't trick.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize