you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
