He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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