Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
