I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
