Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
