So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize