I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
