I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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