i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize
