On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
