The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
