I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
