I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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