so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
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