While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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