whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
