coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize