dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
