my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
