i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize