My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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