I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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