My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
