I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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