I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
