Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Randomize
