lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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