I think I just saw someone hide a body.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize