the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
