Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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