Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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