We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize