Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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