I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
