Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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