also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
how does that bad decision feel?
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