my mouth tastes like poor choices
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
