Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
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