i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
