It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
