i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
